Can I just say how much I absolutely love our community?
For those of you who know a bit of our journey [this will come as no surprise], you know our experience with Church has been, well... less than stellar, bordering on the edge of downright painful. We know what it feels like to be deemed by a community as an outsider. [One comment was made that it was impossible for us to believe what we do and even be Christians... but that's another post for another day.] In fact, for the past few years Jamie and I have truly wondered if there was something wrong with us, something deep within that just made us "un-churchable".
It was almost a year ago that we came to Sa'kred - pretty battered, pretty wounded. We were in need of a community that would love us, believe in us, and nurture us. I came to Sa'kred in the role of teaching pastor - a role that is supposed to exude confident leadership [or so I've been told]. Yet the place I was in, I had this deep and haunting awareness of everything I was not. I was scared. I was numb and empty.
It's been almost a year now. And what we've encountered in the Sa'kred community has been the most amazing thing I have ever encountered in a faith community. We've honestly been embraced for who we are, allowed to be who we are and feel what we feel. We've been invited into people's lives, some of the most amazing people we have ever known. In short, we've been loved, truly loved.
Sa'kred is at a crossroads of sorts right now. Our lead pastor, Aaron Gutridge, is on a six week sabbatical. It's been six years of toiling in the lead role of Sa'kred and it's exacted a toll on Aaron and his family. He's taking some much needed rest and time away to reflect on the journey, where it has come from and where it could possibly go from here. During this time, I've stepped in to help lead our community.
As I look at who we are, where we've come from, and what could possibly lie ahead - I can honestly say that I have rarely been this energized and genuinely filled with hope. I hung out with my buddy Stephen this morning [at one of my low rent offices] and we both had this growing sense that God is doing something quite extraordinary in our midst. It feels like something is coming, but we don't quite know what it is. All I know is that the journey for Jamie and I has come full circle - from being deeply hurt by the church to finding hope and healing within the church. The Sa'kred community has become something rich in our lives, something more profound than words.
Last night [we've been meeting on Sunday nights at 5pm for the month of July], we continued our teaching on Rhythms by exploring breathing as a metaphor for prayer. So just as our breathing is something that is unconsciously essential for our lives, so would prayer be. Just as exhaling and inhaling are two sides of breathing, so we would experience times of genuine exhaling, holding nothing back from God, and experience times of inhaling, drawing in a spirit of peace and love, of restoration and a sense of wholeness in our lives. It was an amazing time together.
Afterwards, a bunch of us headed out to Pizza Port, a local favorite, for a little pizza and libation. As I sat around the table, I couldn't help but be absolutely blown away.
I thought about our journey.
I thought about this community.
And I thanked God.
[By the way, I highly recommend the Carlsbad Chronic.]
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